GImmanuel Kant was a real piss-ant
Dwho was very rarely stable.
DHeideggar, Heideggar was a boozy beggar
Gwho could think you under the table.
GDavid Hume could out-consume
CSchoppenhauer and Hegel.
DAnd Whittgenstein was a beery swine
Gwho was just as sloshed as Schlegel.
GJohn Stewart Mill, of his own free will
DOn half a pint of shanty was particularly ill.
DPlato they say could stick it away,
GHalf a crate of whiskey every day.
GAristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
CAnd Hoppes was fond of his dram.
DAnd Rene Descartes was a drunken fart.
G "I drink, therefore I am."